Upon A Pillar Placed
by empty blank
Summary: "I must think...but I'll never abandon you. But you must let me think," Thor reasoned. Loki snarled and turned away from him, curling his knees up to his chest and burying his face in his lap. "Then go and think Thor." Thorki m/m slash. if it's not your thing, please read so you can be converted. :


He counted his steps as his boots loudly smacked the stone underneath him.

_Ten…_

_Eleven…_

_Twelve..._

Twelve steps across all the way around. Loki grimaced. There wasn't enough room to his liking but at least he wasn't sentenced to death as the law had stated he should be.

With a graceful fall, he sat down on the pillar holding him up. He gazed around him and was met with nothing but darkness, the only light shining down upon him. He sighed and rubbed his temples.

When Thor brought him back to Asgard, Loki really had expected death as punishment, however it seems Odin still cares for his Jotun 'son'. Loki snickered. Could he r_eally_ be called that anymore?

So here he was sentenced to however long it was to rot alone on a cold, stone pillar with a surrounding bottomless pit, void of all his magic and any company. Not counting his magic being gone, Loki was actually thrilled at not having to be in the presence of any Asgardians.

Even Thor hadn't shown up in a two weeks' time. Loki sneered.

Of course Thor burrowed his way into Loki's thoughts often now. Loki felt his chest tighten and felt all those hidden emotions build up again. Hidden desires that licked at his heart and soul. He quickly shook his head and pushed back those thoughts and feeling and tried to concentrate on the nothingness surrounding him.

He spread his legs out before him and inspected his nails. Another point of mild annoyance for Loki was the unabashed amount of boredom that hung around him. He was a trickster, he needed, nay craved, entertainment. Loki sighed again before lying down and stretching his arms out on either side of him.

Loki closed his eyes and figured a nap would suit him some. Before completely falling into the blackness of sleep, a loud smack resounded and the pillar vibrated with impact. He half rose and leaned on his elbows, his legs still perfectly straight in front of him.

He stared at the intruder of his isolation and gave an audible huff of annoyance. Thor stood there in all his glory holding his hammer and wearing that damned feather helmet. Again those hidden feelings pushed at Loki's chest and threatened to explode from his throat.

"It is good to see you brother," Thor said with a light smile. Loki sneered and rolled his eyes. He looked back to a still smiling Thor.

"And what do I owe this most devastatingly _wonderful _visit?" Loki asked, voice dripping with sarcasm as he laid back down upon the cold stone.

Thor shifted before setting Mjölnir down as well as his helmet. He ruffled his long blonde hair back and stared at Loki with open arms.

"Is it a crime to visit my brother who as it seems," Thor looked around the pillar with an unimpressed look and crossed his arms, "has no other means of entertainment?"

Loki smirked and let an angry laugh escape his mouth. He turned his head so his cheek pressed against the stone and glared at Thor.

"Are you impressed with my prison dear Thor? I must say I am quite dazzled by the design of it all," Loki declared one hand coming up to sweep across the pillar and to point into the sparing surrounding blackness.

Thor chuckled before walking over to the edge and peering down.

"Is there a bottom? I wonder if there is something down there?" Thor murmured. Loki began to laugh again. Light disturbing giggles flowing freely.

"I'd hope not. I've taken to pissing over the edge quite often. I'd hate to have pissed on some poor person or creature," Loki paused then tilted his head, "well maybe not considering the circumstances."

Thor stalled a bit before he came over and loomed over Loki. His face was straight and he seemed to be studying Loki's expression, which was of one eyebrow poised high up and his top lip curled up elegantly into a small snarl.

"What do you want Thor?" Loki asked turning on his side so he didn't face his once upon a time sibling.

"…We've never had a chance to talk before. About why you…why do you want to hurt me so?" Thor asked, his stormy blue eyes filling with sadness. Loki stiffened. Deep rolls of anger boiled in his belly, along with confusion and despair.

"Why didn't you ever give up on me?" Loki questioned sitting up from his position and turning towards Thor. The words were harsh and hissed; Loki would have them no other way. Thor's eyes widened and he stepped towards Loki.

"You are my brother. I love you, is there any simpler reason?" Thor asked, his usual roar of a voice finding its way again. Loki smirked.

"It seems love is the root of our problem then. Love never hesitates to cause destruction in its path," Loki answered staring into the blackness. His chest was tight and his heart ached.

Thor's eyebrow piqued.

"Care to explain Loki?"

Loki stood from his spot and crossed his arms. He made his way close to an edge and stared at a crack running through.

"I was never enough was I?" Loki asked, his back still turned to Thor. He snickered as he imagined the full confusion lacing the Thunder God's face.

"What? Loki-" Thor started.

"I was never enough for father, or Asgard…or you. It seems like I'm always getting abandoned."

"What? I've never abandoned you brother. Ever. How many countless times have I tried to include you?" Thor asked. Exasperation twined with his voice and his heart began to burn at the sudden anger lacing his chest.

Thor was tired of Loki pitying himself. He had to face the consequences and explain himself.

"Yes of course, you did everything in your power. But what about your friends? Always distrusting me, then again, how could I blame them? Everyone in Asgard wanted my head even before I…well, before my little schemes," Loki said turning to Thor. He hugged himself and tilted his head as Thor's face reddened with more anger.

"I want you to explain why you did what you did? Was it all jealousy? Or did you hate me all along? We are brothers!" Thor shouted, his fists clenching at his sides. Loki's face contorted into hate as soon as Thor finished speaking.

"We are not brothers! I am a Jotun, son of Laufey. The man I killed for your father, for Asgard! And what do I get? Hate? Distrust? They wanted my head after I got rid of their biggest problem! Even you wanted me punished!" Loki screamed back. He took a step towards Thor.

Thor narrowed his eyes and his stance became rigid.

"I didn't want you punished, but you endangered father."

Loki laughed, he placed one hand on his belly as he nearly doubled over.

"I only wish I could have done more, with the way he told me my true heritage. Goodness, imagine my shock when he told me I was a monster, the very same that he snatched from my real father!" Loki was in hysterics, giggling with fervor.

Thor snarled and grabbed Loki by the shoulders and gruffly shoved him causing the trickster to fall to the floor. He stood above him and glared heatedly at the God of Mischief who was suddenly very sober.

"Don't you dare speak of _our _father that way," Thor's voice was ice. Loki's lips twisted into a smirk.

"Why can't I talk of _your_ father? The man who always favored you? Who always doted you? Who was willing to serve you the kingdom on a shining platter?" Loki asked, menace leaking into his voice and he pushed himself onto his knees.

Thor growled before twisting around and letting his cape flare behind him.

"So it was petty jealousy. And here I thought it would take more to rile you on brother. You who seemed more _advanced_ then all of us Asgardians," Thor spit back. He turned to face Loki again.

Loki himself was smirking lightly and staring at Thor.

"No, not just jealousy. It was greed, and a thirst for power, and the need for recognition, and the overwhelming guilt of the feelings I have for you," Loki spoke slowly. Thor's face twisted into heated confusion. A grimace danced on his face as he stepped towards Loki.

"You would never know the pain I felt staying by your side. Valhala only knows I wanted to deliver some of it back to you. As I said before, love never hesitates to cause destruction in its path. Especially the specific kind of unrequited."

Thor's eyes widened, and his fists unclenched. His body felt heavy and light at the same time.

"Do you know the things I want to do to you? The thoughts that plagued my mind as I stood by your side? Those exact thoughts that brought me to climax, night, after night, after night? I want you to love me not as a brother, I want you to love me like a lover. I want your days and nights filled with thoughts of me. I want you to brim with lust for me, and I want you to want me."

Loki looked to Thor, who was still wide eyed, but slowly, ever so, recognition dawned on his face.

"I want you to fuck me. I want you buried deep in me as you cum. I want to taste you and feel you. Do you understand yet Thor? This is why I am not your brother."

Loki scooted on his knees over to Thor taking his time. Thor looked down at him as Loki placed tentative hands on either of Thor's thighs.

Loki's heart raced and he awaited Thor's reaction. Emotionless Thor stared at him, then one of his large hands rested on the top of Loki's head. Loki's eyes widened themselves as he tried to discern Thor's actions.

"We are not brothers."

The sentence that left Thor's lips made Loki smile wide on the inside. He nodded his head to Thor as hope blossomed in his chest. Then as close as he could, he scooted closer to Thor's legs. Loki's knees brushed the tips of Thor's boots and his hands slipped gently up and down on Thor's thighs.

Then the large hand fell from Loki's head listlessly, and Thor turned his gaze to the darkness ahead of him. Loki's smile dropped and his hands stilled.

"…But being your brother is all I've ever known…" Thor continued. He took a few steps back from Loki and ran a hand through his golden hair.

Loki fell forward and his palms fell against the cold stone. The joy that had been making way into his heart began to crack and water filled his vision. Emptiness began to pierce his chest.

Thor turned and picked up his hammer and helmet. His movements were slow and deliberate. Thor put his helmet on and grasped Mjölnir tightly. He turned to Loki, his eyes were filled with some emotion Loki could not place.

"Would you leave me now too? After I've told you my secrets and reasons?" Loki asked, the familiar distrust and anger making its way into his voice.

Thor's eyes widened before he furrowed his brow in explanation.

"I must think, but I'll never abandon you. But you must let me think," Thor reasoned. Loki snarled and turned away from him, curling his knees up to his chest and burying his face in his lap.

"Then go and _think _Thor."

And with that Thor was gone.

_**Damn. This chap is angsty as a mother. Anyway I'll have ya'll know that the next chap will be filled with hugs and kisses and smut and some fluff and shit will be resolved.**_

_**I would also like to add I am sick so I'm going to be stuck in my bed with my laptop writing more stories for everyone. Yay! Other than this story right now, I have another but I'm editing it and don't know if it's one of my best pieces or the shittiest so I may put that up and ummmm? That's the end of this author's note soo…**_

_**Oh, wait! I'm eating a chocolate chip cookie.**_

_**Its delicious.**_

_**R&R pwease. **_


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